The problem with the baby is that, unless you have a scheduled c-section, you don't have a countdown clock. We could be T-minus 4 weeks, or T-minus 4 minutes.
We're making our last-minute preparations, which includes packing our "go bags." I've been told that go bags are very than many other types of bags, including golf, grocery, douche, saddle, bean, rosin, and bowling.
In the go bag, (and by "go bag", I mean "go bags") you have to cram everything you own. This includes, but is not limited to:
toiletries, pillows, Mountain Dew, underwear, clothes, wiffle-ball bat, clothes for the baby, a hat for the baby, mittens for the baby, a pacifier for the baby, a pacifier for the mother, contact lists, That Thing You Do! on VHS, camera, video camera, batteries, memory cards, Flintstone vitamins, car seat, hard candy, several JeffJams/Jeffapalooza/Joestock mixed cassettes, streamers, cigarettes*, cigars**, urine samples, my wife...Yeah.
So, I've resigned myself to being okay with forgetting something, so long as it's not the wife. She's the important part during all of this.
Right now, we have a suitcase packed for her, a duffel bag packed for me, nothing packed for the little guy, some snacks, cameras (not for the circumcision), and a carseat which is not properly installed.
Hopefully, T-minus 4 minutes is not the case.
*Cigarettes will be chain-smoked*** in the waiting room while I wear a hole in the floor from my nervous pacing back and forth, just like in the cartoons.
** Cigars will be passed out to everyone I meet, letting them know that I've had a baby, and that I'll soon be begging for reasons to get out of the house.
*** I don't smoke. Hospitals don't permit smoking on their property. Waiting room floors are pace-proof. My jolly ass will be coaching in the delivery room, not watching SpongeRobert SquareTrousers in the lobby.
I love first-time parents! I, too, packed several suitcases for baby number 1. After not opening my suitcase ONCE my entire stay, I learned with baby number 2 that a robe, some slippers and few toiletries are really sufficient (of course with the necessary going home outfit and car seat, but that stuff can, no should, really be brought to the hospital on discharge day). The suggestion to pack underwear for mom is the best joke ever... no seriously, you(r wife) will learn to LOVE the hospital provided ultra-sexy mesh panties--but if you meant extra underwear for you when they bring out the needle used for epidurals, then carry on. The hospital provides pacifiers for baby as well if you'll be using one, load up on the freebies! Cameras, of course, are not provided... so yeah, bring those too, but don't go overboard with stuff. Your wife will thank you when she's having hard contractions if you don't have to leave her to take several trips to the car to bring stuff in.
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